Think your day is going bad? Well here's a little perspective to make you feel better.
"Tonight...A special Investigative Report"
So here's a Bad Day story that has to make you feel better about your miserable existence. ...Or at the very least that nagging feeling you have that American journalism has still not even come close to hitting the bottom it is so clearly determined to embrace.
ABC News is circulating a report (via it's online ABC News Blogs network) about a 52 year old man who had a very bad day when he was placed under felony arrest for allegedly stealing a $1.00 cup of soda from a fast food restaurant in Naples, Florida.
Did you hear me?
ABC News. As in ABC News. As in major established mainstream international should-have-better-things-to-do news organization, ABC News.
The unfortunate accused, who has already had his share of hard luck and legal problems, now also has the dubious distinction of having had his name and picture, and even his aliases (...Is nothing sacred?) widely distributed across the internet...all because of a $1 stolen cup of watered down soda.
And while many of us would like to believe that this is not just a cheap way to get web page clicks, but instead the first volley in a battle against injustice by a right-minded crusading journalistic organization trying to defend the rights of the downtrodden, disenfranchised, and the powerless, well...
In the old days we used to call this "Having your name dragged through the mud".
Now we call it "online news".
ABC News is circulating a report (via it's online ABC News Blogs network) about a 52 year old man who had a very bad day when he was placed under felony arrest for allegedly stealing a $1.00 cup of soda from a fast food restaurant in Naples, Florida.
Did you hear me?
ABC News. As in ABC News. As in major established mainstream international should-have-better-things-to-do news organization, ABC News.
The unfortunate accused, who has already had his share of hard luck and legal problems, now also has the dubious distinction of having had his name and picture, and even his aliases (...Is nothing sacred?) widely distributed across the internet...all because of a $1 stolen cup of watered down soda.
And while many of us would like to believe that this is not just a cheap way to get web page clicks, but instead the first volley in a battle against injustice by a right-minded crusading journalistic organization trying to defend the rights of the downtrodden, disenfranchised, and the powerless, well...
In the old days we used to call this "Having your name dragged through the mud".
Now we call it "online news".
Then there's this gem from Associated Press.
You know how Bad Day news stories involving guns usually feature some entertaining combination of criminals and victims?
This one just features dopes.
Michael Deel of Roanoke, Virginia...ostensibly a gun enthusiast...managed recently to fulfill what for many married people, is a secret fantasy, when he accidentally shot his spouse. Unfortunately for Mr. Deel, the .45 caliber bullet that entered his wife's leg had also just passed through his own hand, as a result of him accidentally discharging a .45 caliber handgun while sitting next to his wife.
Even better? Completing the scene was the presence of Mr. Thomas Starke, an educator, in whose home the Deels were sitting at the time of the incident. Almost predictably, Mr. Starke's stated area of expertise is gun safety. He was in the process of teaching a gun safety course...in which the Deels were taking part...when the accident occurred.
Both Mr. and Mrs. Deel were taken to a local hospital where they were treated for non-life threatening injuries.
Asked to summarize the day's biggest event, Mr. Deel described it as a "stupid accident".
Bullseye, Mr. Deel. Bullseye.
You know how Bad Day news stories involving guns usually feature some entertaining combination of criminals and victims?
This one just features dopes.
Michael Deel of Roanoke, Virginia...ostensibly a gun enthusiast...managed recently to fulfill what for many married people, is a secret fantasy, when he accidentally shot his spouse. Unfortunately for Mr. Deel, the .45 caliber bullet that entered his wife's leg had also just passed through his own hand, as a result of him accidentally discharging a .45 caliber handgun while sitting next to his wife.
Even better? Completing the scene was the presence of Mr. Thomas Starke, an educator, in whose home the Deels were sitting at the time of the incident. Almost predictably, Mr. Starke's stated area of expertise is gun safety. He was in the process of teaching a gun safety course...in which the Deels were taking part...when the accident occurred.
Both Mr. and Mrs. Deel were taken to a local hospital where they were treated for non-life threatening injuries.
Asked to summarize the day's biggest event, Mr. Deel described it as a "stupid accident".
Bullseye, Mr. Deel. Bullseye.
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