Think your day is going bad? Well here's a little perspective to make you feel better.
Congratulations BEANTOWN!!! In Daily Bad terms, it's you, ...Boston!...that is currently the 2014 breakaway leader in bizzaro Daily Bad behavior!
And that, faithful reader, is thanks to the so far unidentified New Year's Eve reveler who had her toe bitten off at an admirably raucous New Year's Eve celebration in the city's endlessly entertaining neighborhood of Dorchester.
(Wow. I remember when the measurement of a good party was whether or not you got cocktail wieners.)
At this point it still remains unclear exactly what transpired, but a report published on myFoxboston.com does mention a sexual advance by one female upon another, an exception taking boyfriend, at least two fistfights, and a suddenly unhappy host, biting off the toe of a suddenly un-welcomed guest.
Now THAT is how you kick off a New Year! With blood, pain, 9 toes, and a closet full of shoes that no longer fit!
Public safety officials were quick to point out that this was an isolated incident and not an act of terrorism. "However..." said one first responder, "You can never be too careful. We therefore activated all regional S.W.A.T. teams and deployed six official armored assault vehicles plus an old street sweeper with bunch of auxiliary cops hanging off of it. We code-named the operation "Pedicure". We are happy to report it was a complete success. No further toe bitings have occurred."
A good day for freedom!
A Bad Day for toe hate!
And that, faithful reader, is thanks to the so far unidentified New Year's Eve reveler who had her toe bitten off at an admirably raucous New Year's Eve celebration in the city's endlessly entertaining neighborhood of Dorchester.
(Wow. I remember when the measurement of a good party was whether or not you got cocktail wieners.)
At this point it still remains unclear exactly what transpired, but a report published on myFoxboston.com does mention a sexual advance by one female upon another, an exception taking boyfriend, at least two fistfights, and a suddenly unhappy host, biting off the toe of a suddenly un-welcomed guest.
Now THAT is how you kick off a New Year! With blood, pain, 9 toes, and a closet full of shoes that no longer fit!
Public safety officials were quick to point out that this was an isolated incident and not an act of terrorism. "However..." said one first responder, "You can never be too careful. We therefore activated all regional S.W.A.T. teams and deployed six official armored assault vehicles plus an old street sweeper with bunch of auxiliary cops hanging off of it. We code-named the operation "Pedicure". We are happy to report it was a complete success. No further toe bitings have occurred."
A good day for freedom!
A Bad Day for toe hate!