Think your day is going bad? Well here's a little perspective to make you feel better.
"Dude. Did we lock the car?" Rule #1 to avoiding a Bad Day when you're an FBI agent: Don't leave unattended valuables plainly visible in your car. They might get stolen.
And by car we don't mean your personal ride, we mean your "government owned" car. And by "valuables", we don't mean that five-year-old Tom Tom you've been too cheap to update, or the graduation present IPod from your parents that you loaded with all your Napster bootlegged Dave Matthews recordings, or the wrap around Oakley sunglasses you wear when you want everyone ...(translation: high school girlfriend)... to know, really know ...(just in case she was wondering)... that you're now an FBI agent but not the kind that just looks up stuff on the Internet. You're "tactical" too.
You know, like Jon Hamm in The Town.
No, we're not talking those kinds of valuables, we're talking valuables as in your bulletproof tactical FBI vest and, oh yeah, your FBI issued Colt-M16-A1 assault rifle and your FBI issued HS-Precision Pro-Series 2000 sniper rifle too.
THOSE kinds of valuables.
But for some unfortunate agents working out of the Boston FBI office, that rule was broken recently, and a Bad Day was born. A Bad Day "G-Man Style"...as in "Gee man, getting our stuff stolen, ...really sucks, dude!" Seems some sticky fingered, small time parked car thieves hit the jackpot when they reached into a couple of idle vehicles and got away with the items described above. Either that, or some highly motivated ax grinding bad guys out there really know how to make a good guy look bad.
For it's part, the Bureau has promised to devote it's resources to solving the crimes, even going so far as to offer a $20,000 reward.
With results! As of this morning, fingerprints retrieved at the scene have led to the recovery of the weapons and identification of at least one person of interest. For the good of all, including the agents, we wish them success. We really do. Public safety is at stake.
But man, given the notorious nature of departmental dystopia when it comes to federal/local relationships, we'd be lying if we didn't admit we would have loved to have been sitting in with the lucky lowly local cop who got to take that report.
And by car we don't mean your personal ride, we mean your "government owned" car. And by "valuables", we don't mean that five-year-old Tom Tom you've been too cheap to update, or the graduation present IPod from your parents that you loaded with all your Napster bootlegged Dave Matthews recordings, or the wrap around Oakley sunglasses you wear when you want everyone ...(translation: high school girlfriend)... to know, really know ...(just in case she was wondering)... that you're now an FBI agent but not the kind that just looks up stuff on the Internet. You're "tactical" too.
You know, like Jon Hamm in The Town.
No, we're not talking those kinds of valuables, we're talking valuables as in your bulletproof tactical FBI vest and, oh yeah, your FBI issued Colt-M16-A1 assault rifle and your FBI issued HS-Precision Pro-Series 2000 sniper rifle too.
THOSE kinds of valuables.
But for some unfortunate agents working out of the Boston FBI office, that rule was broken recently, and a Bad Day was born. A Bad Day "G-Man Style"...as in "Gee man, getting our stuff stolen, ...really sucks, dude!" Seems some sticky fingered, small time parked car thieves hit the jackpot when they reached into a couple of idle vehicles and got away with the items described above. Either that, or some highly motivated ax grinding bad guys out there really know how to make a good guy look bad.
For it's part, the Bureau has promised to devote it's resources to solving the crimes, even going so far as to offer a $20,000 reward.
With results! As of this morning, fingerprints retrieved at the scene have led to the recovery of the weapons and identification of at least one person of interest. For the good of all, including the agents, we wish them success. We really do. Public safety is at stake.
But man, given the notorious nature of departmental dystopia when it comes to federal/local relationships, we'd be lying if we didn't admit we would have loved to have been sitting in with the lucky lowly local cop who got to take that report.
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